Basement Entertainment

I’m jealous of my sister and her family.

Why?

Well, they have a basement. Does that sound odd? If it does, then that must mean you have one as well.

I grew up with a basement. We had a recreation room downstairs (which was a great place to hang out with my friends). Plus my parents had plenty of storage space. A house without a basement equals zero storage. So. Yeah. I’m jealous.

The other day my dear sister called to brag about their latest purchase. A pool table: which of course fits neatly in their basement. Am I a bitter jealous older sister? Well… I’m trying my best not to be.

However, she then went on to say our Father came by to check it out. I guess he scared her by saying she should look into pool table covers. He apparently asked her how much they spent on their new pool table and nearly chocked on his water with her reply (ha! I would of loved to have been a fly on the wall for that one). Any way, he felt that their newest investment should be well protected. I’m going to guess he was thinking of my niece and nephew when he said that. At their young ages a spilled drink or a non-washable marker masterpiece could easily happen on the pool table.

My sister (who loves to talk) went on and on, giving me quite the spiel on covers. She discussed how one would help prevent natural wear and tear from pool balls and cue sticks. She also explained that these covers come in all different sizes and colors, so she felt certain she could find a perfect match for their table.

I’m guessing our Dad’s comment regarding her kids and the damage they could potentially do scared her into wanting to protect her new pool table. Frankly, I think it is a smart idea. The last thing you want to see is scratches, water ring marks from drinks, or creative artwork done by a 4 year-old on the pool table fabric. I’m going to guess it would not be easy or cheap to have it replaced. So, yeah, a table cover makes sense.

In the meantime, I’m going do my best to stop competing with my sister. I’ll also attempt not to be jealous of the things she has and I’m living without. Namely… a basement!!!

Shopping with the mother-in-law

While I was visiting my mother-in-law this past week (did I mention she watched the kids when we attended the reunion?) I found myself grocery shopping with her. Nothing says stimulating conversation when shopping for milk, bread, cat supplies, and cereal.

My mother-in-law and I have a interesting relationship. I think I’m a little bitter. When we first married she seemed so loving and supportive. I felt she liked me and was happy to have me in her family. Things changed when I became a stay-at-home mom. Suddenly I wasn’t working and contributing financially. I was viewed as a user who just wanted to spend her son’s money.

Now would be a good time to share that she herself was a stay-at-home-mom. Ironic isn’t it? Darn annoying to me!

I then took a step back and watched and listened to how she interacted and spoke with the other “in-laws”. Whether it was her other daughter-in-law or one of her many sister-in-laws. I soon realized we are second class citizens and not really seen as “true” family members. It is hard for me on many levels. The obvious of course… Yet, she is so wonderful to my kids. That means a lot to me.

So I remain a little hurt and bitter, but keep my feelings quiet. Even when we are at the grocery store and she interrogates me on my use of coupons!

Relationships

Why are friendships between women often drama filled? Not always, but sometimes they can become overly childish.

When my son was around one year of age I joined a playgroup with 4 other moms. We were all new mothers from all different walks of life. At first I didn’t think we had a thing in common. I was wrong though. We were all experiencing sleepless night, teething and all the emotions and fears new moms have. As the first year passed the 5 of us really bonded. I truly believed they would be friends for life. We found other common interests and started hanging out together without the kids.

When our little ones were all past their second birthdays new pregnancies joined our playgroup. I was the first and by the time my daughter was born everyone else was pregnant. We were all excited. As our older ones were about to embark into preschool we were happy to have what we dubbed “Play Group Second Addition” to look forward too.

However, before that could happen drama entered our world. Our first babies were no longer… well little babies. They were walking, talking and interacting with one another. Sometimes their interactions were not pleasant. Listen, they were only 2 years old. They were new to the idea of sharing toys and taking turns. Suddenly our different parenting styles became a problem. One mom would become upset if another mother didn’t correct her child for hitting. Another mother felt uneasy seeing someone else correcting his or her child’s behavior.

This all caused some uneasiness within our once solid group. Eventually a mother verbally attacked another. This sweet, kindhearted woman showed a side of herself that I didn’t think existed. A Mother bear protecting her cub or was it something more?

Our once solid group stopped meeting for our weekly play dates. We'd still see each other at other gatherings and most of us were still friendly with one another. The drama however contiinued. What amazes me is 4 years later the drama still returns every now and then between this once very tight core group of women. I wish I could say that I have not been involved, but I can’t. I’m not proud of that. However, I will say I never started anything. What makes me sad is we had such a strong friendship once upon a time.

In future posts I will share the drama that occured (and is presently happening). It is soap opera filled craziness that will probably make for interesting reading. Maybe I should write a book about it all. I just think it is sad.

Maybe it is because women are so much more emotionally based compared to men. You never hear of this happening between a group of men. Right?

When Friends Divorce

I heard some surprising news last weekend. It has just started to sink in. My husband heard through the grapevine that our old neighbors in California are getting a divorce. In fact he moved out of the house shortly after we left the neighborhood. They were the sweetest couple. I would of never guessed they would separate. I guess it just proves the saying that you never know what goes on behind closed doors. They appeared to be a perfect couple.

I don’t know any of the dirty details. I couldn’t even venture a guess. I just feel bad for their daughters. Their youngest one was just born last summer. She won’t ever have a memory of her parents together. It is really sad.

I know divorce happens in over 50% of all marriages. They are not the first couple I have known to break up. Yet each time it catches me off guard. I don’t know about you. Yet I have friends that constantly are at odds with their spouses. I’d be less surprised if they were to break up. Yet, they are the ones who will probably celebrate their 25th Anniversary. Maybe because they have good communication and can air their differences with one another. I don’t know.

Divorce is a scary word to me. Raleigh Child Custody Lawyer in Wake County, NC – Raleigh, Cary, Chapel Hill, Durham and Apex promise to handle cases in a professional and discreet manner. It must be an interesting profession in today’s world. Dealing with child support issues, child custody, separation agreements, property division, alimony, spousal support and more. I’m sure there is never a dull day.

My husband and I have a great relationship. I hope I never find myself facing a divorce. I don’t see it happening. Yet, I’m sure every divorced couple said that too. Life is complicated.